Brittany Maresh

writer

I’ve been going to karaoke with my friends on Thursdays, and I’ve discovered two things:
Most of my friends sing well and the music I listen to is not karaoke music. Neither of these things are startling revelations, to be honest. I get all my music from my four weird siblings, and my friends are the sort of people who, y’know, go to karaoke.

My current “top five” are all a little different, but they work for what I’ve been writing lately. I was going to make some argument about it not really being representative of the novel I’m currently working on, because the novel itself is weird, but I think that would probably be a lie no matter when I was saying it.

I re-set my song plays every so often, because for whatever reason the top played song get played more frequently. Here are my current top five played songs, with 15 plays in the past two weeks:

• Help Me by Alkaline Trio
• Who I Am Hates Who I’ve Been by Reliant K
• Secrets by One Republic
• Spaceman by The Killers
• Certain Tragedy by Saves the Day

Take from that what you will, because just looking at that list, I have to wonder what sort of monster I’m currently writing. Yikes.
-Bri Maresh

Dear World,

Lately, I have been working on a secret project. I haven’t discussed it with anyone. Not my family, not my friends, not either of my fantastic critique groups, nobody on Absolute Write, not even my own journals.
I have felt really out of touch with writers, lately, too. Isolated, like there was nobody to talk to about plot problems or character issues. It’s been very weird flying solo on this project after so many years of working with fantastic critique groups. I’ve had to think things through on my own, to rely on my judgment in ways I’ve been avoiding by using my critique group like an easy crutch.
I think, also, that it has been good for me. The writing is rough. The project is rough. The ideas are rough. But for the first time in three years or so, they’re also all mine. I can look at it and assess it as my own. The mistakes are mine, the good parts are mine. It’s all mine.
Still, I hope I finish this project soon.
I am starting to miss hanging out and talking to other writers.

Sincerely,

Brittany Maresh

I’m beginning to see a trend in writing: unless you draw a very clear line stating “there is no romantic entanglement,” the readers will consider it a possibility.  If you draw the line too firmly, however, it will be assumed that there will be romantic entanglements, later, and that the firm line is pretense.

I’m really not at all sure what to do with this, since I don’t normally do relationships in my work, as a general rule.  E-mail me if you have an awesome insight to share that will make this less like beating my head against a brick wall.

-Brittany Maresh

Working hard on my current novel the night before a writing group meeting, I had the sudden thought that writing groups were as much a guilt-driven motivation as they are a support-driven motivation.

In this particular case, I have fifteen good chapters in a novel and have for months.  I also have another seventeen not so good ones.  I’ve needed to edit those last seventeen for a while, and until it hit me that my writing group is waiting for them, I had no reason to work on them.

Actually, I’ve kind of been avoiding thinking about them, because they are frighteningly messy.

NaNoWriMo was my excuse not to, but honestly? I think a factor of fear is there.  I’m afraid to fix these chapters, because I’m not sure I can fix them.  And if I don’t fix them, I have to rewrite them.  And if I have to rewrite them, maybe I will make them better, maybe I won’t.

And the idea of not being able to close this story, just leaving it hanging for the rest of my life?  That about terrifies me.

So I’m glad I have writing groups.  Three of them, now, I think.  If I didn’t have them, maybe I’d never work up the courage to make myself finish this.

Then again, sometimes fear can create as much courage as peer pressure.

I don’t know which is more of a motivator, right now, but I’ve started working on it again.  Seventeen chapters.   Circa 40,000 words.  And I’m not going to let them beat me.

-Brittany Maresh

I’m fighting back my Evil Tendencies (yes, I do have them) and not talking about NaNoWriMo, this time. I’d love to gush about being behind on my word count goal (which is not 50,000 words), or to lament about the quality, but I won’t.

I’m not ashamed to be behind on my goal–the goal was a challenge, and I set it unreasonably high on purpose.  The quality of the writing is not top-notch, but some scenes are downright moving.  First drafts are like that, like geodes, in today’s comparison, because I’ve got a geode in the scene I’m writing.

We’ll see how the story turns up–if it’s something I can polish and shine and work into something that’s ready to be queried.  Maybe it’s just a pretty flash, and all my hard work will make fool’s gold.  Maybe not.  That’s for future worries.

Today, I’m just marveling at the process of writing as a group.  It’s strange, and in a way entirely comforting.  You’re surrounded by three other people on laptops–and one with a notebook, usually, and another who has an envy-inspiring typewriter.  You’re all focused inward, on your own stories.  And maybe you IM each other (we do, at least), and maybe all writing stops as someone slaps their forehead.  Until I saw it earlier today, I didn’t really think it was one of those things people really did, while writing, but lo and behold, it is.  Discussion goes for a few minutes, working out a plot kink, discussing a character trait, contemplating the flash point of human beings, and then work resumes.

It’s less lonely, and less daring, but every once in a while, it’s a nice break from the isolated process we usually undergo.  At least, I think it is. But what do I know?  I don’t write a synopsis ahead of time, and I couldn’t outline to save my life.  At least, not beforehand.

-Brittany Maresh, attempting to procrastinate and finding a measure of success

Motivation–what really gets you motivated?  What makes you open up a document and grin, because you know whole-heatedly that there is magic and it can work for you, too?  What makes you so certain, so sure, so very hopeful?

One of my fellow writers group members up here in Alaska had a short story published in an anthology.  It’s not a book all of her own, but it’s not exactly a slouch publication, either.  It was edited by Elaine Cunningham.  Ed Greenwood is in it.  So are a few other “real” authors.

I read about a nice enough writer whose books I enjoy getting an awesome deal.  Another girl I’ve stalked across blogsphere comments landed her dream agent. I have friends who here about these things and feel discouraged–they feel like they’ll never be the one to make it, that everyone else but them is getting ahead in the world.

I just feel psyched.  It happens to real people–and good people, too!  That’s the magic, for me.  That’s what makes me open up the doc and go “let’s do this!”  Maybe it’s hopeful, and maybe it’s incredibly naive, but to me, that’s the magic.

-Brittany Maresh

I promised myself I would try and update, so here I am, updating. Peculiar, that.

For those of you who are fans of Amelia Atwater Rhodes, she’s got this crazy game going on her forums.  It’s a lot of fun, and I think reflects her brilliant sense of humor.  I’m NotAnotherExit there, for the curious, and I’ll give you three guesses who I’m cheering for in this happy little game!

My writing group has had a change of location, right when I needed the stability the most. I was finishing this story or going to die trying, when quite suddenly our meeting spot closed down.  I’m not sure how I feel about our temporary location, other than that I hope it remains temporary.  It’s a bit more… literary.  Artsy?  The feeling is less home-town and warmth, more art gallery, at any rate.  We will see if I get used to it before October 6, when our usual location re-opens.

On a thrilling and exciting note, my friend Tracy Woelfel just got a short story published in Lilith Unbound, an anthology edited by the stunning Elaine Cunningham of WotC fame and published through Popcorn Press.

Happy Harvest Season,

Brittany Maresh

I was a huge X-Files fan as a child.   Lately, it’s where I’m drawing inspiration from.  Not to say I have aliens anywhere in my worlds, or conspiracies.  It’s more that I like the dynamics.  The character struggles. It makes me want to tinker and play with my latest chapters.  It’s the mechanics of faith versus a lack there of.  Scully doesn’t believe.  Mulder believes.  I have a similar pair in my world.

On another front, I’m trying to convince my writing group that we need to do another retreat.  Something where we sequester ourselves away and don’t let ourselves eat until we’ve finished a query letter.  Or, at least, until I’ve finished a query letter.

And besides, we can use the time to discuss NaNoWriMo!

-Bri